Between writing my fantasy story about the figure drawing and yesterday's post of some hot video clips, my sex drive is back in full swing. Once again I've been jerking off to pretty much only gay material, a few tranny and bisexual episodes in between; but for the most part it's been all gay. I think I'm intoxicated with the idea of experiencing what it's like to get a guy hard. To experience that power and control that women must feel over men, straight men anyway, that they could do something sexy and he'd just melt like putty in her hands. The power of subtle sexual control, by being the cause of his erection, the knowledge that grabbing hold of and massaging his cock would be a sensation he could not resist. I think a lot of why I am so attracted to gay fantasies is because of the aspect of envy, that I am jealous of women's control over men. If I was with a man, I might experience some of that power trip, and frankly it'd be just plain fun to have a man paralyzed with arousal. And being a guy, at least I know not to leave him hanging with blue balls, as a fellow guy I'd have enough sense to finish the job.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Monday, September 29, 2008
What Is Gay Sex?
It seems the word sex has many meanings. Bill Clinton got caught in the shaded area of the definition, the classic heterosexual male train of thought: sex does not occur unless I fuck her pussy. When Clinton uttered those infamous words, "I did not have sexual relations with that woman," he was providing a window into the male paradigm, one that bases the definition of sex on committing the act of laying the pipe. There's a few problems with this way of thinking about sex, none the least of which being a charge of perjury when under oath.
My now-bisexual lesbian friend who helped me realize I'm bisexual, was telling me about this time she hooked up with one of her lesbian friends for a one night stand. In the telling the story she said, "we had sex" and at that moment I realized -- neither of them has a penis so sex must mean a lot more than penile penetration. She told me about their tryst, and to her, the sex was everything that happened that night. Licking, sucking, grinding, kissing, fingering, fisting... everything. The whole experience was the sex, and since there was no penis or dildo involved, the meaning of the word had little to do with vaginal penetration.
I just read a really hot true story that got me thinking about gay experiences (again) and the meaning of the word sex. In the story, the blog's author, orange108, talks about his "truth or dare" sleep overs with one of his stepbrothers. They started with little touches of each other's dicks, then progressed to jerking and sucking each other off. Although they never had anal sex, in my opinion what they had was gay sex. And I'm jealous.
Sex has many meanings. Considering that not everyone has a penis, or one that gets hard, or one that's big enough to penetrate anything at all, and that they have a right to have sex as much as anyone, the word sex therefore must mean more than penetrating a pussy or ass with one's cock.
My now-bisexual lesbian friend who helped me realize I'm bisexual, was telling me about this time she hooked up with one of her lesbian friends for a one night stand. In the telling the story she said, "we had sex" and at that moment I realized -- neither of them has a penis so sex must mean a lot more than penile penetration. She told me about their tryst, and to her, the sex was everything that happened that night. Licking, sucking, grinding, kissing, fingering, fisting... everything. The whole experience was the sex, and since there was no penis or dildo involved, the meaning of the word had little to do with vaginal penetration.
I just read a really hot true story that got me thinking about gay experiences (again) and the meaning of the word sex. In the story, the blog's author, orange108, talks about his "truth or dare" sleep overs with one of his stepbrothers. They started with little touches of each other's dicks, then progressed to jerking and sucking each other off. Although they never had anal sex, in my opinion what they had was gay sex. And I'm jealous.
Sex has many meanings. Considering that not everyone has a penis, or one that gets hard, or one that's big enough to penetrate anything at all, and that they have a right to have sex as much as anyone, the word sex therefore must mean more than penetrating a pussy or ass with one's cock.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Erotic Figure Drawing
I saw the ad in the back of our town’s alternative news. It said, “Figure Drawing for Adults. Experience Something New!” I’d taken figure drawing classes before, sometimes the model wore a body-suit, a swimsuit, or rarely nothing at all. This sounded a little different than what I was used to.
“For Adults?” I thought, as I called the number.
A very sweet sounding man answered the phone. He spoke in tender, lisped, feminine tones, and I could tell right away he was gay.
“We wanted to try a different approach to figure drawing, one that celebrates the human form in a more casual, open-minded kind of way.”
This was already sounding pretty interesting.
“We are encouraging all new participants to leave their inhibitions at the door. We will be drawing poses and… positions,” he said suggestively, “not typical of your average figure drawing class. We need to make sure that all new members are aware of and comfortable with the methods.”
“I’m not easily offended,” I offered, hoping to learn more.
“Well good, you may like what our class has to offer then.”
He told me the time and place, how much, how long it runs, and what to bring. “We also let those students that wish to pose do so as well, so bring a robe if you are so inclined.” That made my gut drop. The idea of disrobing and being visually inspected by a group had always seemed arousing to me, but the idea of getting a boner in front of a traditional art class killed that fantasy immediately. Would this really be different like he said?
The class was held in a private home, in a large game room with a draped chair on a large table, surrounded by easels. It was a large house in the fancy part of town, all decked out for a party with ours devours, champagne, and a stack of folded cards that said “TAKE ONE” on the front. Inside the card said, “You have been invited to a Spontaneous Erotic Figure Drawing Class. You may leave if Erotic Nudity doesn’t appeal to you.”
My cock let me know that we were definately going to stay by pressing up against my jeans in a sudden throb of excitement. This was going to be great, I smiled to myself.
Soon the class was underway, and the host stood up to welcome the group. He was a handsome and young-looking 45, in shape and well defined. I guess he was the first model. He had only a small towel wrapped around his waist, and acted comfortable and relaxed. It must have been his home.
"Hi everyone, welcome to Figure Drawing for Adults, I'm Daniel. It's nice to see some new faces, I hope you enjoy the session today." He let his towel drop, and my cock popped. I looked around the rrom to see if anyone else was enjoying this as much as me. The room was mostly men, a few women obviously there with their boyfriends, all my age and older. Except for one guy who acted ashamed at my glance toward him, everyone appeared calm and casual.
Daniel asked if ten minutes would be enough to start the first pose, everyone agreed, and he climbed up on the table, squatted, leaned back, and spread his legs. He was pointed directly at me, legs wide open, as if to welcome me with this delicious introduction. I thought he was looking directly at me, but for the full ten minutes his position and stare did not change, never responding to my smiles and obvious arousal.
He was circumcised, his cock held a meaty stance even soft and curved beautifully into his balls, all of which where perfectly shaved smooth and cropped by a tuft of trimmed hair above. As I focused on the detail of his cock in my drawing, I realized that I was fulfilling a long-time fantasy, and my heart was pounding as I struggled to keep control of my hand and ignore the bulging in my jeans. My cock roared to be let free, but I was still new, I wasn't sure what he meant by "some class members can pose."
After ten minutes an alarm he had set went off and he said, "on to another pose, ten minutes everyone?" And with that he flipped over,
spread his legs, and pushed his package down and back. The pose was so fucking hot I could barely draw it. His ass was perfectly smooth, he had an awesome physique, the cutest little asshole, smooth perineum and a wonderful drape to his balls. It was a picture of Greek perfection, and my underwear was wet with the precum dribbling from my cock hole, my shaft thick with excitement, caged behind my zipper.
I looked around the room, and to my surprise, one of the men had unzipped his pants and his fully erect cock was poking through his zipper hole, nearly purple with blood, engorged and looking in absolute desperation of some immediate attention. Obviously he was enjoying this as much as me, if not more. I looked around and no one seemed bothered by his outward advance. He just continued to draw, ignoring his erection intently. I found it hard to keep my eyes off his amazing display, despite the task at hand and the unbelievably candid pose shown by our host, Daniel.
When the ten minutes was up, I was too horny to go on, so I excused myself to the bathroom, and immediately jerked off into the sink. My mind raced, was this just a wet dream? If it was, I didn't want it to end. How could a group of people have a meeting like this, drawing cock-blowingly sexy things like this, remaining totally cool and calm? How could they not all be fucking on the floor by now? "This is making me so horny," I thought, looking at myself in the bathroom mirror. One damn toss into the sink wasn't going to do it. But I felt so shy, I had never ever been in this type of situation, and I was having a hard time just giving in to the urgings of my cock to rip off my clothes and fuck, blow, suck, and get fucked by everyone in the room. Fuck the drawing, I thought, let's just all fuck like wild dogs already.
Three deep breaths and I steeled the composure to return to the room. When I got back, things were the same pretty much, the guy still had his cock stiffly protruding from his pants, and he saw me look at it again and smiled when our eyes met. I gave him a playful wink and without any delay my dick was hard again in my jeans, which as many guys know can be a restrictive, uncomfortable compressing feeling. Some hard dicks simply don't fit into underwear and jeans.
Daniel had taken on another pose, this time turned on his back, legs spread, clenching his manhood, which had now become erect. He was squeezing it hard to keep the blood in for the full ten minutes. My cock, in the meantime, was having no trouble keeping the blood in, and the pressure was too much anymore, and I looked over jealously at the guy whose cock was pulled out, and feeling the increasing pulse unzipped my own pants and pulled out my aching cock. It throbbed at the glory of being free, and I met eyes of approval from the other guy. Daniel said from his pose, "I see our new member is enjoying the session," and everyone laughed, including me. What a great release to be in a room so exposed and feel so accepted and embraced really. It was awesome.
After his pose, he told us that the first half of the session was over, and that there would be a group pose for the second half. Some of the couples left, and the rest stayed, including me. I was wondering if we would get to pose, I looked down at my cock and looked over to my other cock-bearing class member. He winked.
Daniel went back to an open easel, stayed nude, and two guys walked in who I hadn't seen before. They were both muscular and both hard as a rock. They got onto the table
and assumed a gay bondage-shaving pose that engorged my cock even more. Now this was crazy. Here I was in a room of guys, one of them with their cock out, one nude, and two guys posing on the table. "Where has this type of figure drawing class been all my life?" I said to my neighbor, the guy with his cock out too.
"Where have YOU been?" he teased.
That sent me into orbit. I frantically finished my drawing, eagerly watching the clock for the end of the session. Daniel had given them 20 minutes for this pose, and my cock was dripping with juice. The timer rang, and at that moment the other guy walked over to me, knelt in front of me and gave me a blow job right there while I watched the models kiss and fondle each others dicks. I came in a flood down his throat, zipped up, and Daniel said, "I trust we'll be seeing you for next week's session?"
“For Adults?” I thought, as I called the number.
A very sweet sounding man answered the phone. He spoke in tender, lisped, feminine tones, and I could tell right away he was gay.
“We wanted to try a different approach to figure drawing, one that celebrates the human form in a more casual, open-minded kind of way.”
This was already sounding pretty interesting.
“We are encouraging all new participants to leave their inhibitions at the door. We will be drawing poses and… positions,” he said suggestively, “not typical of your average figure drawing class. We need to make sure that all new members are aware of and comfortable with the methods.”
“I’m not easily offended,” I offered, hoping to learn more.
“Well good, you may like what our class has to offer then.”
He told me the time and place, how much, how long it runs, and what to bring. “We also let those students that wish to pose do so as well, so bring a robe if you are so inclined.” That made my gut drop. The idea of disrobing and being visually inspected by a group had always seemed arousing to me, but the idea of getting a boner in front of a traditional art class killed that fantasy immediately. Would this really be different like he said?
The class was held in a private home, in a large game room with a draped chair on a large table, surrounded by easels. It was a large house in the fancy part of town, all decked out for a party with ours devours, champagne, and a stack of folded cards that said “TAKE ONE” on the front. Inside the card said, “You have been invited to a Spontaneous Erotic Figure Drawing Class. You may leave if Erotic Nudity doesn’t appeal to you.”
My cock let me know that we were definately going to stay by pressing up against my jeans in a sudden throb of excitement. This was going to be great, I smiled to myself.
Soon the class was underway, and the host stood up to welcome the group. He was a handsome and young-looking 45, in shape and well defined. I guess he was the first model. He had only a small towel wrapped around his waist, and acted comfortable and relaxed. It must have been his home.
"Hi everyone, welcome to Figure Drawing for Adults, I'm Daniel. It's nice to see some new faces, I hope you enjoy the session today." He let his towel drop, and my cock popped. I looked around the rrom to see if anyone else was enjoying this as much as me. The room was mostly men, a few women obviously there with their boyfriends, all my age and older. Except for one guy who acted ashamed at my glance toward him, everyone appeared calm and casual.Daniel asked if ten minutes would be enough to start the first pose, everyone agreed, and he climbed up on the table, squatted, leaned back, and spread his legs. He was pointed directly at me, legs wide open, as if to welcome me with this delicious introduction. I thought he was looking directly at me, but for the full ten minutes his position and stare did not change, never responding to my smiles and obvious arousal.
He was circumcised, his cock held a meaty stance even soft and curved beautifully into his balls, all of which where perfectly shaved smooth and cropped by a tuft of trimmed hair above. As I focused on the detail of his cock in my drawing, I realized that I was fulfilling a long-time fantasy, and my heart was pounding as I struggled to keep control of my hand and ignore the bulging in my jeans. My cock roared to be let free, but I was still new, I wasn't sure what he meant by "some class members can pose."
After ten minutes an alarm he had set went off and he said, "on to another pose, ten minutes everyone?" And with that he flipped over,
spread his legs, and pushed his package down and back. The pose was so fucking hot I could barely draw it. His ass was perfectly smooth, he had an awesome physique, the cutest little asshole, smooth perineum and a wonderful drape to his balls. It was a picture of Greek perfection, and my underwear was wet with the precum dribbling from my cock hole, my shaft thick with excitement, caged behind my zipper.I looked around the room, and to my surprise, one of the men had unzipped his pants and his fully erect cock was poking through his zipper hole, nearly purple with blood, engorged and looking in absolute desperation of some immediate attention. Obviously he was enjoying this as much as me, if not more. I looked around and no one seemed bothered by his outward advance. He just continued to draw, ignoring his erection intently. I found it hard to keep my eyes off his amazing display, despite the task at hand and the unbelievably candid pose shown by our host, Daniel.
When the ten minutes was up, I was too horny to go on, so I excused myself to the bathroom, and immediately jerked off into the sink. My mind raced, was this just a wet dream? If it was, I didn't want it to end. How could a group of people have a meeting like this, drawing cock-blowingly sexy things like this, remaining totally cool and calm? How could they not all be fucking on the floor by now? "This is making me so horny," I thought, looking at myself in the bathroom mirror. One damn toss into the sink wasn't going to do it. But I felt so shy, I had never ever been in this type of situation, and I was having a hard time just giving in to the urgings of my cock to rip off my clothes and fuck, blow, suck, and get fucked by everyone in the room. Fuck the drawing, I thought, let's just all fuck like wild dogs already.
Three deep breaths and I steeled the composure to return to the room. When I got back, things were the same pretty much, the guy still had his cock stiffly protruding from his pants, and he saw me look at it again and smiled when our eyes met. I gave him a playful wink and without any delay my dick was hard again in my jeans, which as many guys know can be a restrictive, uncomfortable compressing feeling. Some hard dicks simply don't fit into underwear and jeans.
Daniel had taken on another pose, this time turned on his back, legs spread, clenching his manhood, which had now become erect. He was squeezing it hard to keep the blood in for the full ten minutes. My cock, in the meantime, was having no trouble keeping the blood in, and the pressure was too much anymore, and I looked over jealously at the guy whose cock was pulled out, and feeling the increasing pulse unzipped my own pants and pulled out my aching cock. It throbbed at the glory of being free, and I met eyes of approval from the other guy. Daniel said from his pose, "I see our new member is enjoying the session," and everyone laughed, including me. What a great release to be in a room so exposed and feel so accepted and embraced really. It was awesome.After his pose, he told us that the first half of the session was over, and that there would be a group pose for the second half. Some of the couples left, and the rest stayed, including me. I was wondering if we would get to pose, I looked down at my cock and looked over to my other cock-bearing class member. He winked.
Daniel went back to an open easel, stayed nude, and two guys walked in who I hadn't seen before. They were both muscular and both hard as a rock. They got onto the table
and assumed a gay bondage-shaving pose that engorged my cock even more. Now this was crazy. Here I was in a room of guys, one of them with their cock out, one nude, and two guys posing on the table. "Where has this type of figure drawing class been all my life?" I said to my neighbor, the guy with his cock out too."Where have YOU been?" he teased.
That sent me into orbit. I frantically finished my drawing, eagerly watching the clock for the end of the session. Daniel had given them 20 minutes for this pose, and my cock was dripping with juice. The timer rang, and at that moment the other guy walked over to me, knelt in front of me and gave me a blow job right there while I watched the models kiss and fondle each others dicks. I came in a flood down his throat, zipped up, and Daniel said, "I trust we'll be seeing you for next week's session?"
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Friday, September 26, 2008
Flaccid Phallic Ruminations
There is just something innocent and inherently cute about a flaccid cock. While soft, it poses no threat of penetration, has no sexual prowess, it's merely a cluster of flesh arranged as a bladder drain, nothing more than a utilitarian dangle tube.
Hairy flaccid dicks act like little turtle heads peeking out from scarfed necks, timid and trembling. They look like eels backing into a furry cave, acting simultaneously confident in, and terrified by, their surroundings. The natural state of male genitals is like an uprooted bush, a tangly mess of protective fur for the vulnerable package to take refuge.
Uncircumcised soft dicks conjure images of aardvarks and elephants, the tips having a nasal, woodwind-like cone of folded flesh, a carrot tip of epidermal overburden. Like a funky, skinny turnip with a pulse.
Uncircumcised soft dicks conjure images of aardvarks and elephants, the tips having a nasal, woodwind-like cone of folded flesh, a carrot tip of epidermal overburden. Like a funky, skinny turnip with a pulse.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Libido Shifts to Asexual
Last few days I can barely find a pic, clip, video or anything get off. I don't feel sexy. I'm turned off by the idea sex. I'm exhausted with trying to get my thoughts out on this blog, I feel totally asexual and I don't know how long this will last. Ho hum.
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