Since the election, I've been in a pretty good mood. And since I felt a need to celebrate yesterday, I went to my favorite strip club. Most people go at night, for obvious reasons, but I went in the middle of the day. The place is always dark inside, all hints of daylight stamped out like a casino, so in a way it doesn't matter when you go. Honestly, I find the daytime the best time to go, because there's no crowds, and things are usually slow, so the girls have more time to talk.
As per my usual routine, I bellied up to the bar for a few drinks while I looked around to see who's hot and who's not. A dancer with a platinum blond wig, tiny tiny tits, and a really nice body caught my eye early on. After waiting about half an hour for her to make the rounds, give a few lap dances, and schmooze her regular customers, I was ready for a lap dance myself.
Another young woman I hadn't seen yet on stage was giving a few lap dances too. She had a really nice body, incredible ass, and when she came over my way I cast her a big smile. She sat down on my lap and we made small talk for a few songs. She was really cool, but had these huge fake tits. As I've mentioned before, fake tits turn me off, but since her ass was so nice and she knew how to move it. Before we started I said, "do you have a favorite booth?" And she replied, "I think I know what you're saying, but right here is pretty private actually."
During the entire dance, no matter what she did, I didn't feel a single tingle or swell in my shorts. Then she took out her fake tits and rubbed them on my bulge. They felt like two soft rocks, two stiff water balloons, and my cock literally ran for cover. This was a first, because usually being touched by anyone when I'm that horny has my cock standing at attention in two seconds flat, but this time it was my cock that fell flat. I knew fake knockers turned me off, but I didn't know that my dick would react so negatively. It was as if her fake tits made all the rest of her body repulsive to me. I paid her for the dance and said thanks, but I didn't have the heart to tell her that I had never failed to get hard during a dance before, and that her tits were a real turn-off. I figured that probably a woman with fake tits is pretty insecure about her body, has spent thousands and endured unbearable pain, so the last thing she needs to hear is that the boob job she hoped would increase her appeal in the club has instead decreased my desire to an imperceptible level.
Feeling a little disappointed, I noticed the platinum blond over at the DJ booth and went to talk to her about a lap dance. This is how to know your money's no good at the strip club: She says, "sure honey, but I have to go on stage next and then there's a few guys ahead of you, but I'll come find you after that, I promise." Yeah right. Rejection at the strip club. Nothing could be worse.
So instead I focused my attention to a svelte brunette, and smiled at her each time she walked past me. Finally she stopped and said, "why are you smiling?" So I said, "cause you're fucking hot as hell that's why." And she laughed and sat down. She had such a fine body, nice B-cup tits, thin waist, flawless skin. Her nose was a little big, which gave her that girl-next-door appeal: not outrageously pretty, but oh so cute. I ended up getting three dances from her, but I wasn't able to get off. I wanted to see her pussy, touch it, have her take out my cock and dance on it and jerk me off, but this club is pretty strict. So what I got instead was $60 of frustration and left feeling 100 times hornier than before.
I've heard about people getting a little extra at the strip club, but it has never happened to me.
As per my usual routine, I bellied up to the bar for a few drinks while I looked around to see who's hot and who's not. A dancer with a platinum blond wig, tiny tiny tits, and a really nice body caught my eye early on. After waiting about half an hour for her to make the rounds, give a few lap dances, and schmooze her regular customers, I was ready for a lap dance myself.
Another young woman I hadn't seen yet on stage was giving a few lap dances too. She had a really nice body, incredible ass, and when she came over my way I cast her a big smile. She sat down on my lap and we made small talk for a few songs. She was really cool, but had these huge fake tits. As I've mentioned before, fake tits turn me off, but since her ass was so nice and she knew how to move it. Before we started I said, "do you have a favorite booth?" And she replied, "I think I know what you're saying, but right here is pretty private actually."
During the entire dance, no matter what she did, I didn't feel a single tingle or swell in my shorts. Then she took out her fake tits and rubbed them on my bulge. They felt like two soft rocks, two stiff water balloons, and my cock literally ran for cover. This was a first, because usually being touched by anyone when I'm that horny has my cock standing at attention in two seconds flat, but this time it was my cock that fell flat. I knew fake knockers turned me off, but I didn't know that my dick would react so negatively. It was as if her fake tits made all the rest of her body repulsive to me. I paid her for the dance and said thanks, but I didn't have the heart to tell her that I had never failed to get hard during a dance before, and that her tits were a real turn-off. I figured that probably a woman with fake tits is pretty insecure about her body, has spent thousands and endured unbearable pain, so the last thing she needs to hear is that the boob job she hoped would increase her appeal in the club has instead decreased my desire to an imperceptible level.
Feeling a little disappointed, I noticed the platinum blond over at the DJ booth and went to talk to her about a lap dance. This is how to know your money's no good at the strip club: She says, "sure honey, but I have to go on stage next and then there's a few guys ahead of you, but I'll come find you after that, I promise." Yeah right. Rejection at the strip club. Nothing could be worse.
So instead I focused my attention to a svelte brunette, and smiled at her each time she walked past me. Finally she stopped and said, "why are you smiling?" So I said, "cause you're fucking hot as hell that's why." And she laughed and sat down. She had such a fine body, nice B-cup tits, thin waist, flawless skin. Her nose was a little big, which gave her that girl-next-door appeal: not outrageously pretty, but oh so cute. I ended up getting three dances from her, but I wasn't able to get off. I wanted to see her pussy, touch it, have her take out my cock and dance on it and jerk me off, but this club is pretty strict. So what I got instead was $60 of frustration and left feeling 100 times hornier than before.
I've heard about people getting a little extra at the strip club, but it has never happened to me.
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2 comments:
"I've heard about people getting a little extra at the strip club"
They're probably worried about local vice raids. Once a club gets a rep for crossing the line, vice tends to revisit them regularly in an attempt to bust them.
At the last club where I worked, the employees had to use an employee-only exit at the back into a secure parking lot just so none of the girls did any trade with the customers -- this was because the management had some vice problems in the past and they were terrified of being shut down.
Good point.
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