Monday, September 8, 2008

Pendulum Away From the Pedestal

Since I've been writing this blog, I've been more clued in to my sex drive on a daily basis. Writing about sexy things every day has got me feeling horny most of the time. My posts are often spontaneous, but when I'm writing my stories, I usually take a few days to play out the scenarios in my head, and decide how I want the story to go. During this time I am constantly thinking about sexual fantasies and flirtatious situations.

I like to have photos accompany my short stories, so I'll do a lot of porn surfing looking for the right pic. Several times I have found something different than what I was looking for, but something so hot that I have to grab hold of my cock and jerk off right there. This constant stimulation can add days to when a story I'm writing actually gets published, as I keep getting distracted with all the porn surfing and wanking.

My libido has been swinging from straight to gay lately, leaving not much else in between. The other week when I was writing about ex-girlfriends and the pleasures of pussy, my sex drive was focused on women, all my porn surfing dedicated to jerking off to pictures of hot, young, naked women.

Last week, though, I have felt scantly the urge to stroke my love muscle to pictures of women. I've only been surfing for pictures of big beautiful cocks, cute fuckable guys, pert shaved little assholes, muscular asses, shoulders, hips and thighs. My dreams have been consumed with a lust for cock. Pussy has barely even crossed my mind.

I'm generally a shy person, and I think that's what keeps me from going out and trying to hook up. Although I have only thus far fantasized about gay sex, somehow it doesn't seem like it would be that hard to get. Guys love to fuck. I'm sure women do too, but our society has this crazy prude/slut dilemma in which women use the prospect of sex for manipulation. My impression is that most women don't really like sex on a fundamental level, but they know men do, so they use it as a tool to manipulate men into doing what they want. They use pussy as leverage to control them.

Whereas between two men, they know the whole point is to get laid, there's no misunderstanding there. And they haven't had all this Cinderella, glass slipper, Knight in Shining Armor bullshit driven down their throats their whole life. They haven't been tricked by this damsel in distress imagery that makes American women think their cunts are the holy grail, a secret treasure only to be deployed when she thinks he might be her Prince Charming, a lure to get that ring on her finger. Then the majority of men who commit to traditional marriage have put the pussy on a pedestal, and rarely ever get to see it again. Countless married men have proven this theory.

Now, I'm sure there are exceptions to every rule, and sexual dynamics are greater than my atrophied perspective. I imagine much of my impetus for the development of this theory has been my overall difficulty in assuming the roles required of men to "get laid" by American women [Side note: American women are mostly prude in their home country, though I have heard they cut loose overseas]. The behavior publicly displayed by men to try to get in some chick's pants is nothing short of comical.

I'm looking forward to testing my theory at the gay bar. It's not a matter of not having the opportunity, it's a matter of going outside of my comfort range to allow the prospect to arise. But once I'm there, I have a feeling that talking to guys and hooking up will feel more natural and not as contrived as in the hetero world. Women demand a mind-boggling array of flips, jumps, hoops, performance tests, shell games, mystery and silent innuendo to get into their pants. Men will take yours off for you.

No comments: