Fantasy Fulfillment Services

I talked to my friend more last week about me hiring her as a sex worker. Turns out she's been fantasizing too about what I might hire her to do, so we talked at length about it. And it was exciting! I told her most all of my ideas about what services I might need, and she had a few ideas too. It was funny because one of my requested services was to tie her up and have domain over her pussy for touch/feel, vibrator play, shaving, fisting, whatever my cock desires. Her idea was to tie me up. That wasn't on my list. It sounds good though, and I wouldn't mind paying for dominatrix services, but I have to admit that I'm more interested in a paid submissive.

We hadn't discussed price before, and considering she's a massage therapist and already commands quite an hourly wage, I figured that double her regular fee would be a good place to start. That was before I knew that she charges $75 - $100 an hour for massage! So already we're looking at an expensive fantasy.

In contrast, I know of a sex worker through a friend of mine, and she charges $150 for the whole night. Another friend of mine says he took a stripper home once and paid her $150 an hour for sex. So those seem like bargains compared to my friend's quote. Though when I think back to another friend's bachelor party this summer, I recall paying $150 for a six-song lap dance in the V.I.P. room. Foolish me didn't know that the V.I.P. room isn't where you get "extra" services, and it took that long of dry grinding for me to cum. So by that standard, $150 an hour is cheap!

We didn't make a decision about price, but merely put some figures out there to mull over. She is seeing someone right now, and although she told him that she is strictly non-monogamous, she says he still gets jealous (typical insecure male trying to take ownership of a pussy) and she needs to talk to him about it first. My thoughts are that it's a job and it's her personal business, but I still admire her honesty. Besides I wouldn't want to come between her and a good thing.

I hope we'll be able to come to an agreement, because I'd like to pay her for some sex play, but not sure I want to pay her for sex. I know that sounds weird, but since I've already had sex with her, somehow I feel strange about paying for something that I've gotten for free. It's all the other stuff, the fantasies that are beyond sex, that I want to pay her for. The scenarios and activities that are not normally associated with conventional sex. Like the massage therapist who breaks the rules and jerks me off, the naked yoga instructor, the paid submissive, etc.

Lame and Distant but Still Horny

This week's been a struggle to focus energy on this blog. I wanted to be able to have an insightful, meaningful, or deeply personal post at least once a week, but my reservoir of emotions and self-awareness seems to have dried up for the past week.

I haven't really had any profound revelations to share lately, not to mention my wireless router decided to block all traffic and I can't figure out why, so I've been spending less time online because I have to crouch in a corner on a 3-foot LAN cable to log on to the friggin internet. My normal routine of taking the laptop to whatever part of the house or yard that inspires me to write has been replaced by being captive to a cramped, slouchy space with an uncomfortable chair.

I am pleased to report, though, that I talked to a friend this week about fulfilling some fantasies, so that's cool. She's a massage therapist, and she's always very strict about maintaining her professional boundaries. Sex and professional massage don't mix, especially if you want to A) keep your license to practice, and B) stay out of jail. So I wasn't sure how she would react to me asking if I could hire her as a sex worker instead of a massage therapist, I thought she might get pissed. Though, we have talked before and she told me that being a sex worker has always been a fantasy of hers, so I guess I knew she wouldn't be too offended.

My fantasy scenario, well one of them, involves a massage therapist setting, but she breaks the rules (I also want to try this with a man). She doesn't stop at my upper thighs but continues up to the goods. I want to lay stark naked on the massage table, cock hard and sticking straight up, no towels or sheets to cover me. She gets naked, lets me oil up her body and while she massages me, maybe even fondle her pussy, then she climbs up on me and uses her full-body, her tits, cunt, and ass to massage me. Once we're totally oily and I'm hard as stone, she hand-massages all the parts that are normally off limits for a legit massage. Caresses my balls, strokes my cock, fingers my ass, massages my perineum, my prostate, and makes me cum in explosive bursts all over and then rubs it into my skin. For her tip I'd fuck her something fierce.

Shower Fantasy

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Libido Back On Track

Between writing my fantasy story about the figure drawing and yesterday's post of some hot video clips, my sex drive is back in full swing. Once again I've been jerking off to pretty much only gay material, a few tranny and bisexual episodes in between; but for the most part it's been all gay. I think I'm intoxicated with the idea of experiencing what it's like to get a guy hard. To experience that power and control that women must feel over men, straight men anyway, that they could do something sexy and he'd just melt like putty in her hands. The power of subtle sexual control, by being the cause of his erection, the knowledge that grabbing hold of and massaging his cock would be a sensation he could not resist. I think a lot of why I am so attracted to gay fantasies is because of the aspect of envy, that I am jealous of women's control over men. If I was with a man, I might experience some of that power trip, and frankly it'd be just plain fun to have a man paralyzed with arousal. And being a guy, at least I know not to leave him hanging with blue balls, as a fellow guy I'd have enough sense to finish the job.

Homo Erotic Massage

When I was in high school, I used to raid my dad's Playboys and Penthouses. The Penthouse magazines were more dirty so of course I always leaned more toward them. One had a story about a married man who had gotten a professional massage from his wife as a gift for their anniversary. The masseuse was a man, and in the story the guy got an erection during the massage, and the masseuse jerked him off and made him come, then quietly finished up the massage.



That story was so exciting because at that time I was completely in the closet to myself, so I was surprised to be turned on by it. Since then I have always wanted to get a massage from some hot guy and when I get hard he strokes me off, just like in the story.



I have only ever gotten professional massages from women, for fear of my cock reacting to this fantasy. It's against professional ethics to massage private parts, and I've only ever paid for a massage from a licensed massage therapist. I've never been to a massage parlor or erotic massage type place, just offices and spas.

Anyway, I'd love to get an erotic massage from some beautiful guy someday, like in the story I read as a teenager, and get stroked by some hunky sexy naked guy. It would be even more exciting if he got hard too, because then I'd know that he was turned on by massaging me and it would get me even harder. It would be great to have a handjob last as long as a paid massage, say, half an hour?

I recently bought a bottle of Astroglide. It's really slippery and lasts a long long time. I've been jerking off with it every once in a while, trying not to overuse it. I've wanted to save it for when I get some beginner anal toys, it's great for anal, I've been told.